Regrets

         In our life, we have things that we regret that we wished not to happen. “What have I done?” Those are the words that we usually say once we saw the results from the mistakes that we did. We all know that we cannot bring back the moments when we made those regrets. We can only stop these things if we can only change that certain mistake that we have within our own selves.

                There is just one thing that I regret the most even right now; Being I. It is somehow weird that I regret being myself. But that is the truth. I regret those moments whenever I’m becoming my own self. This results for someone important to me to be hurt. There is a part of me where I’m a selfish, stubborn and a careless person. I know that I regret it but there are moments when I just notice that I am myself once I realized that I made a mistake. I always think that there is a mistake in everything. It is somehow that my brain always looks for a mistake and a deep explanation where I will easily believe on it and it will cause an argument to someone. That’s how my mind perceives on the things that I see, hear, feel and know. There are times when I will just stay silent. That deafening silence causes me loneliness and regrets.

                Right now, I’m starting to change myself. She told me to change my way of thinking because if I will maintain this kind of thinking, it will just cause a never ending argument between us. I’m thinking about the ways on how I will change myself. I should start on knowing about my own self. I know that somehow, with the help of this, I might know the mistake within myself. I know that it’s a difficult problem because the conflict is within my own personality. I have no other choice but to do it in order for me not to cause anymore problem to others. According to her, even though it’s just a small thing, I’m starting to change, not for the bad effect but for the good cause.